Household Pests

[Surgeon General]

No, I'm not talking about the wife & kids.

Everyone's had ants in the summer, a few mice in winter at some point, maybe spiders, centipedes, bees.. I've had all of the above at some point and really thought they were a pain, but.. You do not understand what a pest is until you have had to deal with a sewer fly infestation.

Holy fuck, these things are persistent and annoying. They're also known as drain flies. Apparently, they lay their eggs in the organic gunk that builds up in your pipes and then they turn into tiny little moth like flies that just absolutely infiltrate your house. They don't carry diseases or anything like that, but when I go to take a shit at 1 AM before I go to bed, I swear to god, I feel like a fucking five year old Ethiopian swatting flies off my distended belly. They are all over.

I've tried everything, including pouring that industrial strength acid based drain cleaner down all of my drains- you know, the kind that you have to buy in a little baggie in case the seal breaks? I can't get rid of them. I cannot fucking wait until we move out of this dump.

[J.Brew]

Are those the little fuckers who will hang out inside of dirty draught systems? When you go to pour they fly out of the tap and inevitably one ends up in the head of your beer. I used to work at a bar that will remain nameless and it had problems with these little guys. I used to have to pour off a bit of brew from each tap before we opened so the customers wouldn't end up with 'em in their glass.

[Surgeon General]

probably, the same thing happens when I turn on the faucet in my bathroom. A few of them fly out of the drain every time I open it up. But of course I'm ready with the 409 at my side like Wyatt Earp, ready to fuck those flies up, put 'em in a world of hurt.

Sorry, got some Jay-Z on in the background. Reasonable Doubt, fuck yeah..

[J.Brew]

I'm your huckleberry.

[Surgeon General]

One of the funniest scenes in any Western has to be in Tombstone, when Holliday is verbally sparring with a member of the McLaury gang and the gang member spins around his pistol like a maniac, soliciting oohs and ahs from the crowd. A pause is inserted for dramatic effect.. Holliday then mimics the other guy with his little whiskey glass, eventually drawing boisterous laughter from the bar.

I'd love to have that as an avatar.

[dannypo]

I had those damn things for a while. The way I got rid of them was by finding the drain that they where laying eggs in and dumping 5 gallons of boiling water down the drain every day for about 2 weeks.

It was a pain in the ass but it worked.

[Mrs_Henning]

Aerosol can kill adult sewer flies, but you must eliminate the larval breeding site to control the sewer fly infestation. To find their breeding site, place a clear plastic disposable cup on the openings of all the drainpipes in your home. The emerging adults will collect in the cup over the infested drainpipes' opening. You must clean the drainpipes in kitchens, bathtubs, toilets, showers and laundry rooms each week to control the sewer flies. Always clean the drainpipes with wooden sticks that have flagged margins and/or a stiff brush to remove the slimy gelatinous material and hair plugs from the drains. Then clean one to two feet of drain using a "snake" (plumber's rod). If you clean all the drains thoroughly, this should suffice. Otherwise, you may also want to use commercially available bacterial digester (Gel) to stop the formation of gelatinous material in the drainpipes.

[BadRock]

slimy gelatinous material and hair plugs

That's hardcore, I work at a sewer plant about 90% of the time and it really takes some nasty shit to turn my gut, but that my friend, well it almost does it!