Beer Forum

spiderwrangler wrote:

Ozwald wrote: Coffee's ready & I'm being harassed that our morning cuddle time is running late. Jesus he's demanding when he wants something.

I'm assuming Jesus is your Latin lover?

Yeah, I caught him trying to steal my hubcaps & it was at first

It's always Sunday.

Does the lynx guard the house? (As in - any intruder can expect their eyeballs shredded by Lynx before Smith & Wesson get a hold of 'em)

BrewChoPs wrote:Does the lynx guard the house? (As in - any intruder can expect their eyeballs shredded by Lynx before Smith & Wesson get a hold of 'em)

I'm guessing he would get to the good bits, right quick.

BrewChoPs wrote:Does the lynx guard the house? (As in - any intruder can expect their eyeballs shredded by Lynx before Smith & Wesson get a hold of 'em)

He can hear you a lot sooner than you can approach the house. If you saw him staring out the window, licking his chops at you (& assuming you were enough of a lowlife p.o.s. to want to break into someone's home), would you even think about coming in uninvited? And a more direct answer, yes. He's very territorial over his kingdom & extremely protective of me as well as the domestic cat. If I'm not around or asleep, you'd wish you ran into a starving, abused rott with an attitude problem wearing nothing but a pair of made from a flank steak. I'd still shoot to kill an intruder without hesitation, but the chances are he'd seriously fuck you up long before I could take the couple steps to grab an already chambered firearm.

If I'm here & you're an invited guest, he's a completely different cat. He'd want to play. Perhaps a little rougher than your average cat, but he wouldn't be aggressive at all. Probably just nip at your leg so you'd pay attention to him & throw his pheasant a few times.

Ozwald wrote:

BrewChoPs wrote:Does the lynx guard the house? (As in - any intruder can expect their eyeballs shredded by Lynx before Smith & Wesson get a hold of 'em)

He can hear you a lot sooner than you can approach the house. If you saw him staring out the window, licking his chops at you (& assuming you were enough of a lowlife p.o.s. to want to break into someone's home), would you even think about coming in uninvited? And a more direct answer, yes. He's very territorial over his kingdom & extremely protective of me as well as the domestic cat. If I'm not around or asleep, you'd wish you ran into a starving, abused rott with an attitude problem wearing nothing but a pair of made from a flank steak. I'd still shoot to kill an intruder without hesitation, but the chances are he'd seriously fuck you up long before I could take the couple steps to grab an already chambered firearm.

If I'm here & you're an invited guest, he's a completely different cat. He'd want to play. Perhaps a little rougher than your average cat, but he wouldn't be aggressive at all. Probably just nip at your leg so you'd pay attention to him & throw his pheasant a few times.

Fuckin Awesome! He probably doesn't make any noise like a dog either eh? Just quietly stalks the dumbass intruder and then pounce with claw and fang.

BrewChoPs wrote:Fuckin Awesome! He probably doesn't make any noise like a dog either eh? Just quietly stalks the dumbass intruder and then pounce with claw and fang.

If the intruder ignored the obvious before they tried to enter, the first sign that they'd realize he was there would be paws wrapped around their neck & teeth in the back. I love cats. Along with sharks, they're nature's perfect killing machine. Silent, smart, patient, insanely powerful for their weight with a independent 'fuck you' attitude. Spend enough time around them & you'll discover their intense loyalty, it's just not up front like a dog & reserved for one or two loyal to them. Think of a cougar/mountain lion - those cats only weigh 80-110 lbs in most cases & I doubt any human would think they'd have a chance against one, even if they were 300+. Hell, my 50 lb cat vs a full grown rott... the dog isn't going to have a very good time. They're just too fast, too agile & have 10x the weapons.

The thing that truly blows me away though, is the love. Since I don't have a lot of guests, it's usually just me, him & my 10 yr old domestic. 99% of the time he's the sweetest little boy. He loves his 'sister' as much as me. She's not all that fond of him, mostly because he just doesn't understand how much bigger & more powerful he is than she is, not to mention he turns 3 the day after tomorrow. He's just a big kitten & wants to play constantly. She's just a little too old for that. When they were the same size (he was about 6 months) she used to torment him endlessly. His clumsy ass playing around & out of nowhere a black streak shot out, whap, whap, whap, whap, whap & disappeared before he realized what even happened. It was hilarious. There was only one 'little' problem with her approach. The speed at which he grew.

2 months:


1 year:

Fucking christ, where does the time go? The petite predator is 4 years old today.